Monthly Archives: April 2016

Fungus From Outer Space

29 Friday Apr 2016

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‘Are We there yet?

Simone Jackson sighs.

She knows that the Kids are restless.

Stuck in the Backseat of a Car for Hours cant be easy on

a Child

‘Are We there yet?

This the one question that has driven Parents crazy

since Families first started going on Road Trips.

 

Simone is Driving from Port Headland in South Australia.

To Kalgoorlie in Western Australia to visit Her Parents.

And Her two Kids Kyle and Biannca are in the Backseat

driving H Crazy.

Maybe They can play a Game to keep themselves occupied?

Something like I Spy or count the Cars?

 

But it is hard to count the Cars in the Outback when you might

only see two every Hour.

So they decide to play I Spy.

 

Kyle says ‘I Spy with my little Eye something beginning with R’

And straightaway Biannca guesses Road

Which gets right up Kyles Nose.

But then again maybe they shouldn’t be playing Games.

There is something sinister out there.

And it isn’t a Cane Toad.

 

Simone sits up and starts to pay attention.

There is a strange Buzzing sound.

Like their Car is surrounded by a Million Bees.

Then the Car stalls in the middle of the Road.

The Engine has completely Died.

The Electrics are Fried.

 

Simone is frantic.

She and the Kids are out in the middle of nowhere.

Stuck in a Car that wont start.

The Buzzing sound is getting louder.

And the Kids are screaming.

Then a bright light engulfs the Car.

 

Simone is so engrossed in helping Her Children.

That She doesn’t notice the little Green Spores that have

entered the Car through the Vents.

But then the whole interior is filled with Spores.

The World has turned Green.

But at least the Buzzing sound and the bright lights have

disappeared.

 

The Green Spores are multiplying at an alarming rate.

It looks like a Mould Bacteria or maybe it is a Fungus?

And it is also an Oxygen Thief.

So the Jackson Family has no Air to Breathe.

So with gasps and Faces turning Blue then Purple.

Simone Kyle and Biannca Hug and hold Hands.

And then They Die.

 

Then the Fungus Feeds.

And the Jackson Family is now nothing more then Dust.

And still the Fungus is multiplying.

If You looked at the Car You would think a Giant Green

Balloon was inflating.

It expands and expands

The pressure is building.

Then with a bang the Car explodes.

What will happen next?

 

Billions of Fungal Spores are released into the Atmosphere.

And they are blown in all directions.

North South East and West.

No Continent will escape  the Fungal wrath.

Can anything stop the Earths destruction?

 

A Trucker heading East on the Nullabor Plain is covered in Spores

And as He Drives towards Sydney some Spores jump ship in every

Town and City on the way.

For the Citizens of Australia there is going to be Hell to pay.

 

A Plane Flying overhead is similarly over run by the Fungus.

But this Fungus is very smart.

It lays low in the Cargo Bay.

And as soon as the Plane reaches its destination Japan.

The deadly Spores will ejaculate all over the Island.

 

Overhead a Space Ship is hovering unseen.

Watching as its Fungus Kills then Consumes the Human

Inhabitants.

Then with a Flash it is gone.

 

In London England Big Ben is Silent

For the first time in a few Hundred Years.

The Tower of London Buckingham Palace the Circle and the City

Centre Have all turned a nasty shade of Green.

 

People are hiding in old World War 11 Air Raid Shelters.

But that is little or no defence.

The Fungus just seeps through the Walls.

Turning the Space into an Airless Vacuum.

Then it feeds and multiplies.

 

In Europe nothing can stop the Green menace.

France Germany Austria and Belgium are the first Countries

consumed.

And still the Fungus marches on.

Gas Pipes are ruptured Power Lines come down.

And then Europe begins to burn.

The smell of the decay and rot is enough to make Your Stomach

Churn.

 

The United Nations and the World health Organisation don’t know

what to do.

All they can do is sit and watch as the Earth is consumed with the

Green Fungus.

They race against time to find a way to slow the Fungus down.

To give them a chance to find a Solution.

 

In the United States.

The Country is being swamped by the Fungus.

Only a few of the Northern States remain Fungus free.

And one of those States is Maine.

 

In the small Town of Hullsville.

The Residents know that sooner or later the Fungus will reach

their Town.

So the Locals are desperately trying to find a Place to Hide.

And the only Place they can think of is the Coca Cola Plant.

 

They all huddle together in the Cool Room.

Surrounded by Crates of Coke.

The Thermostat has been turned down so it isn’t that cold.

All they can do is sit and wait.

And hopefully the Fungus will past them by.

 

But no such luck.

The Fungus comes under the Door.

And it seeps straight through the Walls.

The People just sit there with their Mouths open.

They are all too stunned to move.

 

But one of them is drinking a can of Coke.

And with nothing to lose.

He gives the Can a shake.

And He gives the Fungus a spray.

 

And what do You know?

The Fungus Pops and sizzles and then evaporates.

The Cool Room is now Fungus Free.

 

The Guy who sprayed the Coke Jeffrey Latimore.

Is immediately on the Phone to the Local Sheriff

 

Who relays the Message to the Govenor of Maine

Who cant believe what He is Hearing?

The Fungus has been defeated by a Can of Coca Cola?

 

He in turn Calls President Obama with the Good News.

Then the Chain of Command gets to work.

Truckloads of Coca Cola is trucked to Airports all around the Country

And Bombers saturate the Nation with Ice Cold Coke.

 

And lo and behold.

The Fungus is obliterated.

The President of the UN has been watching developments

And once the results are in.

Countries all around the World start to deploy their Air Defences.

 

Over the Next Month the Fungus is totally wiped out.

The Earth is now Fungus free.

All because of the humble Can of Coke.

 

All up it is estimated that over Four Billion Humans lost their Lives.

Will the Human Being Species become Extinct?

 

Meanwhile deep in a Cave in Northern Mexico

A single Fungal Spore has escaped the Coca Cola deluge.

It just sits there waiting for the right conditions.

The right time.

Waiting Waiting

 

Watch out for part Two

Fungus From Outer Space

‘Snot what it seems’

 

Bad Tounge-Part Two (That Cunning Linquist)

21 Thursday Apr 2016

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In Part ONE an Inmate in a Facility for the Insane.

Has stopped taking His Medication.

And a Bad Tongue has started to talk deep inside His

Brain.

The Inmate Killed Two Guards in a bid for freedom.

But then He changed His Mind and returned to His

Padded Cell instead.

 

He cleaned up all of the Blood.

And got rid of all of the Evidence.

He thinks that He has got away with Murder.

And is Home free.

What will happen next?

Well read on and You shall see.

 

Part TWO.

Well after that introduction let Me introduce Myself.

My Name is Clayton Firestone.

And I have been locked away in this place for over a Decade.

 

They say that I have Killed Ten People.

And that doesn’t include the Two Guards.

But I don’t remember a thing.

So here I am in this Loony Bin

The Facility is located in Upstate New York.

And I desperately need to get back Home to Chicago.

With or without permission.

And even crazy old Me knows that I will never be

released while I am still Breathing.

And even though I am a bit out of practise

I am still good at deceiving.

 

I have been taking My Medication

Like a good little Crazy Man should.

And that Bad Tongue has gone all quiet.

I had grown to like that Bad Tongue.

It is like having an imaginary Friend living inside

My Head.

To a Mad Man like Me it made a lot of sense.

Maybe the Time has come to see if the Grass is Greener

on the other side of the Fence.

 

I still cant believe that I got away with Killing those Two

Guards.

After an investigation the Authorities cant Name a Suspect.

But I know that they will never give up.

They will catch Me in the end.

Now go away.

I need to talk to My imaginary Friend.

 

So once again I stop taking My Medication.

And after a few Days My Skin starts to itch.

And My crazy little Heart starts to Flutter.

And once again My Head is filling up with bad words.

As that Bad Tongue starts to Mutter.

 

That Bad Tongue tells Me that the Facility is built above

an old abandoned Mine.

And that a Tunnel is only Twenty Feet down.

That Bad Tongue keeps talking and talking.

As My crazy thoughts keep going round and round.

 

But how am I supposed to Dig when I am confined to

a Padded Cell?

And I haven’t exactly got a Cell full of Tools.

Plus My Cell is on the Third Floor.

So I decide to start taking My Medication.

Then I wont Hear that Bad Tongue no more.

 

Then I remember that the Kitchen is on the Ground Floor.

If I could get a Job down there I would have access to  all

different types of Tools.

And I could finally escape from this Ship of Fools.

 

I take all of My Medication.

And pretend that I have grown a pair of Angels Wings.

Butter wouldn’t melt in My Mouth.

But then I Hear a Voice deep in the back of My Brain.

That Fucking Bad Tongue is talking once again.

 

I am taking all of My Medication.

So why am I still Hearing Voices?

I am telling You now Dear Reader

I think I am running out of choices.

 

It has been Months now.

And I am still confined to My Cell

I have been a Good Boy.

So why haven’t I been moved to the Kitchen?

God will I ever get some Peace?

That Bad Tongue is still moaning and Bitching.

 

Then the Next Day a Guard Named Reggie McBride

opens up My Cell Door.

And He tells Me that I am being moved to the Ground

Floor.

I am now a Member of the Culinary Dispensing Team.

In other Words a Kitchen Hand.

But I can now start Dreaming the freedom Dream.

 

I arrive at the Kitchen.

Itching and rearing to go.

I can almost smell the taste of freedom

It is almost within My Reach.

Then that Bad Tongue start to talk real loud.

And starts to Preach.

 

Clayton the Ground down here is as hard as a Rock’

You will never be able to Dig Your way through it’

‘We will have to come up with a better Plan instead’

 

What?

Is this Bad Tongue a Good Tongue after all?

I feel like giving that Bad Tongue a good Kicking

A real Tongue licking.

 

That Bad Tongue is a Cunning Linquist.

It speaks in many Tongues.

It speaks straight from the Hip

And lands You deep in the Shit.

 

I am really confused.

Am I hearing  a forked Tongue?

Is that Bad Tongue a Tongue that likes to give pleasure?

Or a Tongue that likes to inflict some Pain?

But as You know sometimes Pleasure and Pain.

Is one and the same.

 

Now I know for sure that there is no escaping.

I will be here for Eternity.

There isn’t any chance of Me Jumping the Wire

Maybe that Bad Tongue is nothing more than a Liar?

 

That Bad Tongue just wont shut up.

Why isn’t My Medication working?

I am supposed to be nice and Sedated

So why is that Bad Tongue still talking in My brain?

It feels like I am dragging around a Heavy Cerebral

Ball and Chain.

 

I think that I might be having a Stroke.

Something in My Head just snapped.

But I don’t feel any Pain.

Then I remember that it is just Me being Me.

Because after all I am Criminally Insane.

 

I am not Locked away for nothing.

I have done a lot of bad things.

And right now I want to do some more.

 

I am badder than  Hannibal Lector Jeffrey Dahmer or

Ted Bundy.

I am Clayton Firestone.

So You better lock up Your Daughter and Your Grandma to

Young or old they will Die just the same.

So You better not forget My Name.

 

But than again that isn’t entirely True.

Some go down easy.

While Others will put up a Fight.

Nobody wants to Die.

But give Me half a chance

And I will make sure that You do.

And yes Dear Reader.

You aren’t Immune either.

I will Kill You to.

 

I am hearing a new sound.

The lovely sound of silence.

Maybe that Bad Tongue has gone to Sleep?

Or  it is now residing in Someone else’s Brain?

Well that is their loss and My gain.

 

I was going to go out in a Blaze of Glory

But now I really couldn’t be bothered

So I just go back to My Cell

Lay down on My Bed

And I rest My crazy little Head.

 

If You have a spare Hour or Two.

Why don’t You come and visit Me?

I promise that I will be nice.

But if You get too close.

You may pay a very heavy price.

 

Keep an Eye out for Bad Tongue- Part Three

‘T he Beginning’

 

 

 

Rag Doll Part Two (Back From The Grave)

17 Sunday Apr 2016

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In Part One.

My Daughter brought a Rag Doll Home

It was like a little Woollen Chucky.

It tried to Kill Me by laying on My Face while I slept.

But I pulled on the Wool and it unravelled in My Hands

I scooped up all of the Wool

Dug a deep hole in My Back Yard.

And I Buried that Rag Hole Three Feet Deep

 

But in the Morning the Hole was empty

And the Rag Doll was gone

My Daughter Cindy had named that Evil Doll Ragamuffin.

 

Cindy couldn’t find Ragamuffin anywhere

She didn’t know that I had Buried that Doll of hate

I said that maybe Ragamuffin was on the School Bus

waiting for Her.

Cindy ran to the Bus and I saw Her waving at Me from the

Rear Window.

Then She held up Ragamuffin who gave Me an Evil Grin.

That Satanic Doll is now on a Bus full of Kids.

 

Now to Part Two.

I run down the middle of the Road chasing that Bus.

But it is a futile exercise.

So with no Mobile Phone I race back Home to give the

School a call.

 

But what can I say?

‘My Daughter is on the way to your School along with

plenty of other Kids’

‘Oh and on board is the Devils Rag Doll’

‘The Rag Doll from Hell’

 

The Head Mistress would think I was a Nut Case.

A real Fruit Loop.

So I put the Phone down and go to the Garage.

Maybe I can catch that Bus.

 

After about Ten Minutes I am right behind a Yellow

School Bus.

But is this the right Bus?

There are Yellow School Buses everywhere.

 

But then that little Shit Ragamuffin appears at the

Rear Window.

And gives Me an evil Smirk.

Then it bends over and gives Me the Moon.

I don’t know if You have ever seen a Rag Dolls Arse?

But it isn’t a pretty sight.

 

OK Ragamuffin so You wont to play Games

Well alright lets get it on.

The the School Bus starts to weave all over the Road.

At one stage I thought it was going to flip over.

But the Driver gets it under control.

Then it comes to a stop.

 

I race to the School Bus Door.

But it doesn’t open.

And then I can see why.

The Drivers Hands are tied to the Steering wheel with

strands of Wool.

 

But then the Door slides open and My Daughter appears.

I tell Her to come to Daddy.

But She cant because Her Feet are bound with Wool.

Then that deranged Rag Doll appears at Her Ankles.

And it yells at Me to back off.

 

I have noticed that Ragamuffin looks a bit different.

Then I realise why.

It is missing most of its Wool

I sneak a look up the Aisle.

And I can see about Thirty Five terrified Children.

All of them are tied and bound with Wool.

 

I didn’t think that one little Rag Doll could contain

so much Wool.

Then I sneak another look.

And I think that Ragamuffin has grown Taller.

And where the Wool is missing from its Chest.

I can see Armour Plating.

 

That is all I need a Rag Doll built like Robo Cop.

Then before I can do anything the Doors close.

And the Bus pulls away.

 

I race back to My Car

But by the time I can pull into Traffic.

I am confronted by Ten Yellow School Buses.

Which one do I follow?

 

I don’t know what to do.

Then I decide that the best course of action is to call

the Police.

So I dial 911 and I tell the Operator that My Daughter and Thirty

Five other Kids have been abducted by a Madman.

I don’t mention the deranged Robo Cop Rag Doll.

 

A few Minutes later about Ten Police Cars arrive at the scene.

I tell them that the Kids are on a Yellow School Bus

And that they are all tied to their Seats.

And that so far no Ransom demands have been made.

 

One of the Cops tells Me to jump in the back of His

Squad Car.

Then We are off in hot pursuit.

We come up behind a School Bus.

And Ragamuffin appears at the Back Window.

 

In the Half Hour since I last saw that Mad Hatter Rag Doll

Ragamuffin has grown a Foot taller.

IT now looks like a Rag Doll come Robo Cop come Ninja Turtle.

 

The Cop in the Front Seat mutters ‘What in the Fuck?”

So I come clean

And I tell Him all about Ragamuffin.

And how it has turned into a Feral Woollen Chucky.

 

Then the Bus pulls to the Curb.

And Ragamuffin yells out that He will talk to Me and nobody

else.

So after discussing the situation with the Police.

I am suited up in Body Armour I make My way to the Bus.

I also have a Can of Butane and a Lighter in My Pocket.

 

As soon as I reach the School Bus the Door opens

And a gruesome sight awaits Me.

The Bus Driver has been Garrotted by a strand of Wool.

His Face is a Deep Purple colour.

And He has bitten right through His Tongue.

 

Then I walk on in

And halfway down the Aisle Ragamuffin is waiting

He holds up a Hand to tell Me to stop.

And then Ragamuffin speaks ‘Your Daughter is now Mine’

‘There is no stronger bond than a Girl and Her Doll’

 

While the crazy Doll has been talking I have Inched My way

forward.

I don’t know the Range of My Homemade Flamethrower.

So I Inch even closer.

 

Then I notice My Daughter sitting Three Seats back

Her Eyes are pleading for Help

Then I remember Cindy telling Me about the Schools

Earthquake Safety Plan.

 

When a Teacher calls out ‘Drop’

All Students are to fall to the ground and crawl into a Ball

 

I have Inched even closer

Than I tell that Crazy Deranged Child Stealing Rag Doll

‘There is a stronger Bond then a Girl and Her Doll”

‘And that is the Bond between a Father and Daughter”

 

 

Then I yell out Kids ‘Drop’

And they all hit the floor at once

And for a Second that Rag Doll is distracted

And that is all I need

 

I pull the Can of Butane from My Pocket

And I light it up.

And that Rag Doll disappears in a Ball of Flames.

And it Dies without a Sound

 

All of the Kids are safe and sound

And that is all that matters.

 

Cindy has had Nightmares for about Six Months

She refused to Sleep in Her own Bed

 

And to this Day She has never owned another Doll.

 

THE END.

 

 

Comfortably Dumb

15 Friday Apr 2016

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A Friend of Mine recently asked Me to help Him

fix His Car.

Because I am really handy with Tools.

Yeah right and I am also Tall Dark and Handsome.

And we all know that isn’t so.

 

I arrive at His Place.

His Car is in the Driveway with the Hood up.

It is one of those Ford Corolla Toyota Fiesta things.

I recognise the Radiator and the Fan Belt.

And is that a Dip Stick?

Do Cars still have Spark Plugs?

This is all very confusing

My Brain is feeling kind of numb

But I am who I am.

Comfortably Dumb.

 

But I bluff My way through.

My Mate doesn’t seem to notice that I don’t know

a thing about  Cars.

It seems that the problem was the Altenator.

Something about not enough power to keep the

Battery charged.

 

I thought it might have been a loose Hub Cap

Or maybe a faulty Fuse Wire.

But I was wrong.

Sometimes I can be all Thumbs.

But most of the time I am just

Comfortably Numb.

 

Well that went well.

Now I am thinking that I could Renovate My House

How hard can it be?

So I decide to start with the Bathroom

First to go is the Tiles.

 

I might have swung the Sledge Hammer a little to hard

Because it went straight through the Wall.

And right into the next Room

A Hole is good for ventilation right?

 

A little Spak Filler and Grout and Nobody will even notice

And just like a Professional

My Shorts are at half mast.

Showing half of My Bum

But unlike them

I am still feeling Comfortably Dumb

 

Next the Kitchen

Everything has to go

I rip all of the Cupboards

And as I want an Open Plan Kitchen

I knock down the Dividing Wall.

Then there is a creaking noise.

And the Ceiling starts to sag.

Maybe I should have left the Support Beam in place?

 

One of My Neighbours must of dobbed Me in

Because a Council Inspector came around to on My Home

Improvements.

I think Improvements is the right Word

But they tell Me that My House has been condemned

I obviously didn’t add up My sums.

I am still n My comfort zone.

Still Comfortably Dumb.

 

I am thinking about changing Careers

Maybe I could be an Engineer?

I am obviously goo at fixing things.

Problem solving.

I could build a new Harbour Bridge

Or a high rise Building.

In any design that I fancy.

I will create it all on My Computer.

It will be so much fun.

But then I remember that I am

Comfortably Dumb.

 

While the Builders are at My Place

Finishing what I started.

I will crash at My Girlfriends Apartment.

Probably for about a Month.

Maybe I could fix Her Place up?

 

When I tell Her of My Plans.

She shakes Me by the Shoulders ‘You get that idea

out of your Head Mister’

My Apartment is fine it doesn’t need any of Your so

called improvements’

 

Well I am hurt.

I have been cut down to size.

I feel about as big as Tom Thumb.

My Brain is always Numb.

I am always showing half of My Bum.

I am still Comfortably Dumb.

 

A few Hours later.

And we are sitting on the Lounge.

The silence is deafening.

Then My Girlfriend apologises for Her outburst.

I tell Her no apology necessary.

Lets start over again.

We hold Hands and start to Kiss.

And then our Hands start to wander.

Well things are getting real heavy.

So We adjourn to the Bedroom.

 

After about Thirty Seconds of Foreplay.

We are going for it.

I am feeling like a Porno Star.

I show Her all of My moves.

She is screaming and begging for more.

 

I go faster and faster.

And then Urghh ‘Cindy Cindy I think I am gonna Cum’

Well Cindy grabs hold of My Nuts and starts to squeeze

‘Who in the fuck is Cindy?’My name is Chloe’

 

Well She kicks Me out of Bed

And I land on My little Head.

I guess there isn’t any chance of another romp?

Well the Words that She used I cant repeat here.

But most of them contained four letters.

 

I cant believe how stupid I was.

And My Nuts are all bruised and numb.

I guess I am and always will be

Comfortably Dumb

 

I am now safe at Home.

Back in My Natural Habitat.

I now know that I shouldn’t touch any Tools.

I will leave that to the Experts.

 

I am happy just laying around watching some TV.

And scratching My Bum.

I reach for the Remote.

Feeling like My Old self.

Comfortably Dumb.

 

 

Passengers and Ghosts

08 Friday Apr 2016

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I have finally worked up the courage to take to the Sky.

I am Booked on a Flight to New York City.

I have waited along time to make this Trip.

But I am as nervous as a Kitten.

Come on Steven get a grip.

 

The Day has finally arrived.

And I get dropped of at Sydney International Airport.

For My Holiday of a Lifetime.

 

I Book in Two Hours before My Flight is due to leave.

So I have a Coffee and Read a Book to fill in the Time.

 

Finally My Flight is called and I head to Gate No5 for Boarding.

Hopefully My Flight will leave on Time without any delays.

Oh Yes happy Days.

 

There are People heading in all Directions.

Passengers taking their Christmas Holidays.

I hurry so I wont be late.

And after what seems like forever

I finally reach the Boarding Gate.

 

After Boarding

I make My way to First Class.

I thought if I am going to be on a Plane for Twenty something

Hours.

I might as well have some Creature comforts.

 

Maybe I can get some Sleep.

And when I wake up I will be in New York City.

But then the Guy in the seat next to mine.

Turns My Flight from good to very shitty.

 

Just My luck.

The guy in the next Seat is talking about One Hundred

Words a Minute.

He is going Home to New York after a Month long Holiday.

God are there any Words in the English Language

That this Guy doesn’t know how to say?

 

After Five Hours He is still yapping

I think I will have a Drink to Drown My sorrows

Or maybe a handful of Sleeping Pills

Cause if the Flight Attendant doesn’t help Me.

God I know I will Kill.

 

I know that He is nervous about Flying.

So He talks and talks to take His Mind off it.

We are over Twenty Thousand Feet above the Ground.

I would give anything for some Silence.

Never to Hear another Sound.

 

But silence I do not get.

The Guy is still Talking

I look over to tell Him to shut the fuck up

And I am dumbstruck

The Air goes very still.

And it is like Time is moving in slow motion.

 

Because right before My Eyes.

The Guy has become Transparent.

He now looks like Casper the friendly Ghost.

 

The Ghost Guy is still talking.

But now He is talking in the past tense.

My Name was Barry Andrews

And I was an American Citizen.

I used to be a used Car Salesman

And I Died way to early.

 

Well that got My attention.

And I asked Him how did He Die?

He told Me that He Died in a Plane Crash.

I was shaking so much I could barely Speak

I asked the Date of His Death.

And even though I already knew the Answer.

He told Me anyway.

‘I Died on Qantas Flight Qan156 Three Hours out of New

York City.’

‘On the 1st of May 2016’

 

Shit just what I thought.

That is Todays Date.

And I am on Flight Qan156.

 

I need to get to the Cockpit to tell the Captain to turn the

Plane around.

I am sitting next to a Ghost.

Twenty Thousand Feet above the Ground.

 

Barry Andrews the Transparent Person

Is still talking.

But I really need to block Him out.

Where are all of the Flight Attendants?

When I get out of My Seat I see that I am surrounded

by Ghosts.

The Plane is full of Transparent People.

 

Flight Attendants are like Cops.

There are never any around when You need One

I race down the Aisle looking for some help.

But all I can se are Alive Dead People

If that makes any sense.

They are all seating in their Seats watching a Movie

or just having a Chat.

But these People have already Died.

They all look fit and healthy

They don’t even look tired.

 

I make My to Economy Class

And sitting in one of the Seats is a little Girl about

Eight Years Old.

She looks scared and frightened

 

But She has a Pink healthy glow

So I know that She is Alive and kicking

But I have to keep moving

Because the Clock is ticking.

 

But I cant leave Her.

So I introduce Myself and take Her Hand.

She seems to know that I am Her only chance of Survival.

 

Then an announcement comes over the Speakers

‘Thank You for Flying Qantas we will be landing in New York

in a little over Three Hours from now’

‘Please enjoy an in Flight Movie and before You know it We

will be Landing  at John F Kennedy Airport’

 

Jesus the Three Hours are almost up

There isn’t any Time to think of a Plan

So I grab the little Girls Hand

We take our Seats

And just wait for the inevitable.

 

The little Girl and I are the only Survivors of Flight Qan156

She never told Me Her Name

All up Three Hundred and Ten Passengers and Crew Perished

But they will Live forever in the Hearts of the People they

Cherished.

 

I will never again take to the Sky.

I will keep My Feet firmly on the Ground.

But maybe I can take to the Water?

So I decide to take a Ferry Ride.

 

But when I arrive at the Ferry Terminal

I can see that is full of Transparent People.

Another Accident is about to happen

But there is nothing that I can do

Because they have already passed to the Other Side.

 

Wherever I go I am surrounded by Transparent People

Ghosts living their final Day.

 

If You ever see a Transparent Person

Give them some Dignity and Respect

Because after all One Day We will all Die.

And it just might be Your turn next.

 

 

UFC ( Ultimate Fighting Cockatoo )

01 Friday Apr 2016

Posted by in poems, stories, Uncategorized

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I was relaxing in My Lounge Chair.

When I heard a sound at the back Door.

And what did I find?

Sitting on the Railing was  this ugly ratty featherless

Cockatoo.

I say Featherless.

It did have a few Feathers on its Head and Wings.

But its Body was bare.

 

It almost looked like a Chicken ready for Baking.

But the poor thing was distressed frightened and shaking.

 

As soon as I opened the Screen Door.

It flew off into the nearest Tree.

Where it was soon joined by Two more Cockatoos

Who proceeded to attack it with force.

And its remaining Feathers drifted to the Ground.

 

I ran Outside waving My Arms about.

And the Two rogue Cockatoos took to the Sky.

But the Featherless Cockatoo remained where it was

Showing a lot of guts and clout.

 

I didn’t see that Cockatoo for a few Weeks

I thought that it has probably been pecked to Death.

But then I heard a familiar sound at the Back Door.

And once again that Featherless Bird was sitting on the

Railing.

But this time it really was Featherless.

All that remained was the Yellow Crest.

 

I was amazed that it could still Fly.

Without any Feathers and Down.

That Cockie looked at Me and let out a little Sigh.

And I couldn’t let that sorry Bird down

 

I told that little Cockie to stay where it was.

Like it was a Dog.

I raced inside and grabbed a slice of Bread.

Back Outside I offered that Bread to the Cockie.

And it jumped onto My Arm and started to nibble.

God this Cockie was covered in Scabs from a lot of Fights.

And as I had  a closer look.

I saw that it was also covered in Mites.

 

So I took it inside  and put it in the Laundry Sink

Then I filled a Spray Bottle with Washing Liquid Vinegar

and Water.

Then I told Cockie to close its Eyes.

And I sprayed away.

That poor Bird was saturated.

And hopefully all of the Mites will Drown.

As the suds go down the Drain.

That tough little Bird still hasn’t made a sound.

 

It seems to know that I wouldn’t hurt it.

So it stays nice and calm.

I dry it off and wrap it in a Towel.

And I feed it some more Bread.

Then it starts Squawking and Shrieking.

Loud enough to wake the Dead.

 

I don’t know what to do.

I just hold out My Arm

And it climbs right on up.

Till it is sitting on My Shoulder.

And it starts to nibble on My Ear.

 

I don’t know whether it is a Cock Bird or a Hen

But I have to give Cockie a Name.

And after some thinking.

I Name that Bird ‘Lockie the Cockie.’

 

For over a Week Cockie didn’t leave My side.

We Slept Ate and Showered in the same Room.

Lockie is starting to back to good health.

Most of its Feathers have grown back.

That Bird has become part of Me.

But it is a Wild Animal.

So it should be wild and free.

 

I take Lockie out to the back landing.

It is time to say Goodbye.

Then Lockie starts flapping its Wings.

Then He takes off and disappears amongst the Trees.

I don’t know what to say.

I just whisper ‘Come back one Day Lockie please’

 

Over the next few Months My Life returns to normal.

Lockie must have moved away.

Maybe it flew away to find a reliable source of Food?

Or to find itself a Mate.

Shit I better get to Work

Or I will be late.

 

As I head towards My Car.

I am confronted by Two Thugs.

Who want to steal My Wheels.

Then they start pushing Me around

Asking Me to hand over the Keys.

 

Then a loud Shrieking noise fills the Air.

That sends a chill up My Spine.

Then Lockie the Cockie attacks the Two Criminals like

a Bengal Tiger.

Ripping and Clawing at their Faces.

And those Two Thugs run away like scared little Boys.

I scream out Yeah go Home to Mummy and play with Your Toys’

 

Well it looks like I now have a Cockatoo Bodyguard.

But I still have to get to Work.

So I tell Lockie that ‘I will be Home before You know it You’ll see’

So He Flies of My Shoulder.

And lands in a nearby Gum Tree.

 

As soon as I arrive Home from Work.

Lockie swoops down and lands on My Shoulder.

Like a Security Blanket.

He is on the lookout for any signs of danger.

I wouldn’t get to close.

If I was an up to no good Stranger.

 

Lockie os a good judge of character.

So if Anyone with good intentions gets close.

Lockie will give them a friendly Squawk.

But if they have bad intentions

He will flap His Wings and Shriek.

 

And if they don’t get the message.

Lockie will attack like a demented Magpie.

He is My own dive bombing Missile.

Straight from the Sky.

 

Maybe Lockie and I could be  Bouncers at a Pub

Or Security Guards inside a Bank.

Or We could protect Delegates at the United Nations.

Or maybe Lockie could be the first Cockatoo in Space.

So if You want to stay safe

Just use your common sense

And stay out of My Face.

 

But most of all I would like to see Lockie step into the Ring

for the UFC Championships.

He could be a real Contender.

He knows all of the moves Kicks and Punches.

Lockie is the Real Deal

Not just some fucking Pretender.

 

So if You ever see Lockie and Me walking down the Street

Come and say Hello.

But if You have bad intentions

You will be shut down by one very nasty Bird.

And I don’t think that You will like Lockies point of view

Cause Lockie is one bad tempered Shit Kicking Head Stomping

Cockatoo