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Tag Archives: fungus

Fungus From Outer Space Part Two (Snot What It Seems)

28 Saturday May 2016

Posted by stevenjohnno in poems, stories, Uncategorized

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Tags

aliens, arseholes, extinction, fungus, human beings

In Part One  a Spaceship bombarded Australia with

Green Fungus.

And it quickly spread Worldwide.

Over 5 Billion Humans were Killed Outright.

 

Then by chance Employees at a Coca Cola Bottling Factory

in Maine USA.

While under attack by the Killer Fungus.

With nothing else at hand.

Sprayed the Fungus with Coca Cola.

And the Fungus sizzled and evaporated.

 

So the humble Can of Coke saved the World?

The Earth is now Fungus Free.

Well not quite.

 

Deep in a Cave in Northern Mexico

One tiny Fungal Spore lays in wait.

It can wait for a Million Years if it has to.

 

Part Two Five Years Later

The World is slowly returning back to normal.

The Green Fungus from Outer Space is just a bad Memory

Human Beings are once Breeding at an alarming rate.

People just go about their business without a care in the

World.

 

In Northern Mexico a group of American Tourists  are Cave Diving

Even though they are all wearing Miners Lamps.

The light barely penetrates the thick Blackness.

So they don’t notice a tiny Green Fungal Spore springboard

into Tommy Bolin’s Left Nostril.

 

In the Five Years that it has been waiting

The Green Fungal Spore has Mutated.

It has built up a resistance to Coca Cola.

The fizzy Cola Drink can no longer affect it.

 

Since it has been Living in the Cave.

It has survived on Bat Nasal Mucus.

And it is now nestled in Tommy’s Nostril.

It begins to Feed on the plentiful supply of Human Snot.

 

As it Eats it divides and multiplies

What was One is now Sixteen.

And just like little Green Fleas

The Fungus jumps into the Nostrils of the other Three Cave

Divers.

So Glenn Hughes Jon Lord and David Cooper are all now affected

by that Snot Eating Fungus.

 

As the Green Fungus Multiplies it sends out a strong signal.

That is picked up Alien Beings on Planet X.

Once all of the remaining Humans are totally Eradicated.

An empty Planet will be sitting there waiting for new Tenants

to move in.

 

When the Cave Divers reach the Surface they cant stop Sneezing

And with every Sneeze thousands of Fungal Spores are released

into the Atmosphere.

 

At their Motel Rooms they Sneeze.

On the Plane Home they Sneeze.

At the Airport when they land they Sneeze

When they arrive Home in Kansas they Sneeze

All up they have Sneezed a total of 8048 Times.

Releasing over 5 Million Fungal Spores.

And that is only with Four People Sneezing.

What will happen when 40,000 People start to Sneeze?

 

From Kansas the Fungus quickly spreads West to Seattle

East to New York North into Canada and South to Texas.

 

Then as Tourists continue to Travel.

The Fungal Spores Travel with Them.

With every Sneeze Human Beings are One step closer

to Extinction.

And because the Fungus lives and Eats in the Nasal Passages

People think that they just have a Cold or Flu.

So with every Sneeze even more Spores are released.

 

People in Europe Asia and the America’s are Sneezing and Coughing

at an alarming rate.

In just over a Week 99% of the Human Population are Terminally

Infected by the Fungus.

 

The World Health Organisation realising that the Deadly Green Fungus

is back.

So they immediately suspend all travel by Air Land or Sea.

People the World over are Ordered to stay inside their Homes until

further Notice.

But it is already way too late.

 

The Fungus is still spreading and the only Humans not Infected

live on a few remote Islands and Antartica

But the Fungus is unrelenting so it is only a matter of time.

 

Now the Fungus is Transforming.

It has travels down from the Nasal Membranes and down

into the Stomach and Intestines.

Where it grows bigger and bigger.

And stronger and stronger.

Nothing on this Planet will be able to offer any resistance.

 

The Fungal Spores attach themselves to the Intestinal Wall

Where the Transformation is now complete.

The Fungal Spore is now an Embryo.

So now 995% of the Human Population.

Both Male and Female.

Has an Alien Foetus growing in their Intestines.

 

The Foetus sucks all of the Nutrients from its Human Host.

And they grow larger and larger.

Then after a Month of Stomachs Cramps Diarrhes and Constipation

99% of the Human Population make their way to the Toilet.

But it isn’t a Bowel Movement they are having.

They are all giving Birth.

 

As they sit down to do their business.

Most of them are so Sick they no longer care if they Live or Die.

Then their Arseholes expand to the size of a Dinner Plate.

And at exactly the same time the World over.

99% of the Human Population give Birth to 5 Billion Alien Babies.

 

Then those Green Alien Babies have a wash in the Toilet Water

Then They climb out of the Bowl and re enter the Arsehole

And start to Feed.

If their Human Hosts aren’t Dead yet

Then they soon will be.

 

As they Eat they are growing even bigger and stronger

Then when they have finished they leave behind a Human Husk

Now 5 Billion Human Husks are blowing in the Wind.

The Aliens now rule the Planet.

Long Live the Alien.

 

5 Billion Aliens now inhabit Earth.

And yes they do look a lot like ET.

Only none of them know how to  use a Phone.

Will there be any Human resistance at all?

 

Highly unlikely.

Because the last Human still Alive.

Olaf Sanderson from Greenland has Died.

On the 1st September 2016 the last Human Being is Dead

The Human Being Species is now Extinct

 

On Planet X the Supreme Leader is very Happy.

Planet Earth has been Conquered.

Now they will have to come up with a new Name

Earth is a bit to well  Earthy.

 

So after a lot of Debating and arguing

And original thinking

The Name of the the Planet is Earth No2

 

 

 

Fungus From Outer Space

29 Friday Apr 2016

Posted by stevenjohnno in poems, stories, Uncategorized

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Tags

aliens, coca cola, fungus, outer space

‘Are We there yet?

Simone Jackson sighs.

She knows that the Kids are restless.

Stuck in the Backseat of a Car for Hours cant be easy on

a Child

‘Are We there yet?

This the one question that has driven Parents crazy

since Families first started going on Road Trips.

 

Simone is Driving from Port Headland in South Australia.

To Kalgoorlie in Western Australia to visit Her Parents.

And Her two Kids Kyle and Biannca are in the Backseat

driving H Crazy.

Maybe They can play a Game to keep themselves occupied?

Something like I Spy or count the Cars?

 

But it is hard to count the Cars in the Outback when you might

only see two every Hour.

So they decide to play I Spy.

 

Kyle says ‘I Spy with my little Eye something beginning with R’

And straightaway Biannca guesses Road

Which gets right up Kyles Nose.

But then again maybe they shouldn’t be playing Games.

There is something sinister out there.

And it isn’t a Cane Toad.

 

Simone sits up and starts to pay attention.

There is a strange Buzzing sound.

Like their Car is surrounded by a Million Bees.

Then the Car stalls in the middle of the Road.

The Engine has completely Died.

The Electrics are Fried.

 

Simone is frantic.

She and the Kids are out in the middle of nowhere.

Stuck in a Car that wont start.

The Buzzing sound is getting louder.

And the Kids are screaming.

Then a bright light engulfs the Car.

 

Simone is so engrossed in helping Her Children.

That She doesn’t notice the little Green Spores that have

entered the Car through the Vents.

But then the whole interior is filled with Spores.

The World has turned Green.

But at least the Buzzing sound and the bright lights have

disappeared.

 

The Green Spores are multiplying at an alarming rate.

It looks like a Mould Bacteria or maybe it is a Fungus?

And it is also an Oxygen Thief.

So the Jackson Family has no Air to Breathe.

So with gasps and Faces turning Blue then Purple.

Simone Kyle and Biannca Hug and hold Hands.

And then They Die.

 

Then the Fungus Feeds.

And the Jackson Family is now nothing more then Dust.

And still the Fungus is multiplying.

If You looked at the Car You would think a Giant Green

Balloon was inflating.

It expands and expands

The pressure is building.

Then with a bang the Car explodes.

What will happen next?

 

Billions of Fungal Spores are released into the Atmosphere.

And they are blown in all directions.

North South East and West.

No Continent will escape  the Fungal wrath.

Can anything stop the Earths destruction?

 

A Trucker heading East on the Nullabor Plain is covered in Spores

And as He Drives towards Sydney some Spores jump ship in every

Town and City on the way.

For the Citizens of Australia there is going to be Hell to pay.

 

A Plane Flying overhead is similarly over run by the Fungus.

But this Fungus is very smart.

It lays low in the Cargo Bay.

And as soon as the Plane reaches its destination Japan.

The deadly Spores will ejaculate all over the Island.

 

Overhead a Space Ship is hovering unseen.

Watching as its Fungus Kills then Consumes the Human

Inhabitants.

Then with a Flash it is gone.

 

In London England Big Ben is Silent

For the first time in a few Hundred Years.

The Tower of London Buckingham Palace the Circle and the City

Centre Have all turned a nasty shade of Green.

 

People are hiding in old World War 11 Air Raid Shelters.

But that is little or no defence.

The Fungus just seeps through the Walls.

Turning the Space into an Airless Vacuum.

Then it feeds and multiplies.

 

In Europe nothing can stop the Green menace.

France Germany Austria and Belgium are the first Countries

consumed.

And still the Fungus marches on.

Gas Pipes are ruptured Power Lines come down.

And then Europe begins to burn.

The smell of the decay and rot is enough to make Your Stomach

Churn.

 

The United Nations and the World health Organisation don’t know

what to do.

All they can do is sit and watch as the Earth is consumed with the

Green Fungus.

They race against time to find a way to slow the Fungus down.

To give them a chance to find a Solution.

 

In the United States.

The Country is being swamped by the Fungus.

Only a few of the Northern States remain Fungus free.

And one of those States is Maine.

 

In the small Town of Hullsville.

The Residents know that sooner or later the Fungus will reach

their Town.

So the Locals are desperately trying to find a Place to Hide.

And the only Place they can think of is the Coca Cola Plant.

 

They all huddle together in the Cool Room.

Surrounded by Crates of Coke.

The Thermostat has been turned down so it isn’t that cold.

All they can do is sit and wait.

And hopefully the Fungus will past them by.

 

But no such luck.

The Fungus comes under the Door.

And it seeps straight through the Walls.

The People just sit there with their Mouths open.

They are all too stunned to move.

 

But one of them is drinking a can of Coke.

And with nothing to lose.

He gives the Can a shake.

And He gives the Fungus a spray.

 

And what do You know?

The Fungus Pops and sizzles and then evaporates.

The Cool Room is now Fungus Free.

 

The Guy who sprayed the Coke Jeffrey Latimore.

Is immediately on the Phone to the Local Sheriff

 

Who relays the Message to the Govenor of Maine

Who cant believe what He is Hearing?

The Fungus has been defeated by a Can of Coca Cola?

 

He in turn Calls President Obama with the Good News.

Then the Chain of Command gets to work.

Truckloads of Coca Cola is trucked to Airports all around the Country

And Bombers saturate the Nation with Ice Cold Coke.

 

And lo and behold.

The Fungus is obliterated.

The President of the UN has been watching developments

And once the results are in.

Countries all around the World start to deploy their Air Defences.

 

Over the Next Month the Fungus is totally wiped out.

The Earth is now Fungus free.

All because of the humble Can of Coke.

 

All up it is estimated that over Four Billion Humans lost their Lives.

Will the Human Being Species become Extinct?

 

Meanwhile deep in a Cave in Northern Mexico

A single Fungal Spore has escaped the Coca Cola deluge.

It just sits there waiting for the right conditions.

The right time.

Waiting Waiting

 

Watch out for part Two

Fungus From Outer Space

‘Snot what it seems’

 

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