WARNING This story is gross it contains references to different bodily fluids
So if you are offended by bodily fluids don’t read this story.
You have been warned.
Nobody knows where he came from.
He just appeared one day.
People call him mucus man.
A huge mass of green in a somewhat human form.
Sticky to the touch and offensive to the nose
Mucus man isn’t your normal super hero.
But he still stands for goodness and doing the right thing for humanity.
It is 1986 in Los Angeles and the crime rate is on the rise.
Crack cocaine is the drug of choice.
And someone is murdered every two hours.
The police are rushed off their feet by the sheer numbers of people
committing crimes to feed their habit.
They desperately need hand to help clean up the streets.
Superman is at home in metropilis.
While batman is solving crimes over in gotham city.
So L.A could really do with their own super hero right now.
Before the criminals completely take over the city.
Mucus man has arrived at the perfect time.
He is green and mean and a sight to be seen.
And he is here for your protection.
Slimy and smelly,mucus man will not be to everyone’s taste.
But he is here to help clean up the streets and give them back to the citizens.
And he will use any bodily fluid to reach that objective.
So if you commit a crime you better wear a raincoat.
Because if you don’t you will get slimed and taken down.
Mucus man is at home relaxing when his ears perk up.
Somewhere close by people are in distress and desperately need help.
So he jumps to his feet,or at least tries to.
You see mucus man is sticky.
So he peels himself off the couch and races outside.
As soon as he gets outside his snot filled nostrils smell smoke.
Nearby a building is on fire.
So he rolls himself into a huge mucus ball.
And goes to the rescue.
When he arrives at the scene mucus man is saddened to see a five storey
apartment block ablaze.
And from every window on the top floors people are hanging out trying to
escape the flames and smoke.
The firemen at the scene are trying their best to contain the fire.
But with low water pressure their hoses cant reach the top floors.
So mucus man spreads himself out into a giant green slimy safety
The frantic trapped residents look down at the smelly snotty blanket.
And with little choice one by one they all jump.
They all land with a squish and a mouthful of green.
But at least they are all safe and sound.
So they wipe themselves down just happy to be alive.
They watch as mucus man transforms back into his human like form.
The survivors talk amongst themselves and they all ask the same question
‘Who was that man?’
Mucus man is on his way back home when his nostrils start to twitch.
There is trouble up ahead.
By the look of things a bank robbery is in progress.
Mucus man arrives just as the robbers exit the bank with guns drawn.
Shots are fired and mucus man is hit.
But he doesn’t go down.
His body is like a jello mould.
It wobbles on impact and absorbs the bullet.
The robbers scramble to their getaway car and try to flee.
Mucus man isn’t about to let that happen.
So he takes a deep breath holds a finger over his left nostril and unleashes
a volley of snot.
It completely covers the getaway car and the robbers inside.
They are stuck fast with nowhere to go.
So they surrender without incident.
Mucus man is at home recuperating from his lose of fluids.
When once more he senses danger.
Someone is in trouble and needs his assisstance.
Mucus man sighs.
When you are a super hero you are always on call.
You are the ultimate public servant.
But mucus man doesn’t care.
He loves the attention and craves the action.
Mucus man finds himself in a dark dank alleyway.
He creeps forward trying to find the source of distress.
Then he notices a body behind a dumpster.
When he gets closer he notices a pool of blood.
The man on the ground has been stabbed and is bleeding out fast.
Mucus man places his hand over the wound and seals it with his antiseptic
The man recovers enough to tell mucus man that he is a crack addict.
He points to a nearby doorway and says that he bought some crack from
the dealers inside.
But instead of giving him crack they stabbed him and took his money.
Mucus man walks up to the door and listens.
His ears pick up ten different voices coming from inside.
He liquifies his body and flows beneath the door.
Once inside he quickly transforms back into his human form and says
‘Everybody stop what you are doing and stand up with your hands on top of
The ten crack dealers are surprised by the voice and the leader asks’ Where did
you come from you green motherfucker?’
Then the room explodes into action.
The dealers confront mucus man with an assortment of guns and knives.
Mucus man is hit by over twenty rounds but once again his body absorbs
He shots out his mucus covered tongue like a chameleon .
And the twenty foot long appendage strikes over and over capturing the weapons
from the dealers hands.
The recoils his tongue and swallows every weapon down whole.
Once again mucus man has saved the day.
On the other side of the city a deranged madman has taken over a train
heading towards LA central.
He has packed the loco with explosives.
And if his demands aren’t met he will not only destroy the station but half of L.A.
The authorities have been told to deposit 5 million dollars into an account on the
cayman islands by midnight.
If they don’t he will blow up the train along with its 500 passengers.
Mucus man is in his element.
His plan is to spray the train with mucus and run it off the tracks between
If he can spray enough snot over the explosives he will render them useless.
Mucus man is in position three stops from LA central.
And the train is hurtling close.
Mucus man knows that he will need both nostrils for this job.
So he aims at the track just in front of the train.
But ll that comes out is a dribble.
Mucus man has run dry.
And he is the last line of defence.
Los Angeles is depending on him
What will he do?
Mucus man is pissed off.
He knows that there is no one else to save the city.
So he does what he has always done in times of stress.
He drops his pants and starts to stroke his long slimy doodle.
Faster and faster he strokes himself working up a big nut.
The train is now only five yards from LA central.
And closing in fast.
Mucus man is still busy working up a lather.
He knows that if he doesn’t pull this off.
Than Los Angeles will be blown to smithereens.
So he concentrates and his right hand becomes a blur.
It is now too late to aim for the track.
All he can do now is aim for the explosives.
And hope for the best.
Mucus man is really going for it.
He is getting mighty close to a huge eruption.
He closes his eyes calls out to jesus.
And lets loose 200 gallons of white hot jizz.
Mucus man’s knees are wobbly but his aim is true.
The train and the explosives are both engulfed by the stream of super hero
A tidal wave of cock snot has just saved Los Angeles.
Mucus man is given the keys to the city.
His chest swells with pride as he shakes the mayors hand.
The mayor quickly wipes his hand on his trousers.
Because he knows that mucus man has just done the dirty deed.
Once again mucus man has saved the day.
He is always in the right place at the right time.
You can always rely on the mucus man
Just wear a glove if you ever have to shake his hand.